How To Get a Stress-Free, Amicable Divorce
Divorce is never easy, regardless of the age and financial status of the couple. They can however, be amicable and end with suitable conditions for both parties. This might be hard to believe but it is a possibility. Couples go through a lot during their marriages and even after that. Here are a few key factors to focus on when going through a divorce:
Acknowledging the failure of the marriage
If there are any hopes of getting through a divorce amicably, both partners have to acknowledge that things aren’t working. This is a very difficult fact to accept as couples are more likely to want to keep working on a marriage. Over 48% of American marriages end in divorce for different reasons.
Infidelity, past conflicts and financial situations all take a toll on the marriage and partners tend to drift apart. The problem is, even after years of trying, partners refuse to accept defeat. Moreover, acknowledging the fact that the marriage isn’t going to work will put both partners on the same page and make divorce proceedings easier.
Counseling
Just because both of you have admitted that the marriage is coming to an end, doesn’t mean that there are no issues. Counseling helps reduce the tension and both partners get a chance to air out their feelings, outside of a formal setting. Sometimes, counseling can even help couples reconnect and make them want to stay together. In other cases however, the counselor acts as an impartial party for conflict resolution. It helps both parties stay civil and sane throughout the long process of ending a marriage.
Have set rules
Once the divorce has come through, former partners have to see each other regularly. Children, mutual friends, family relations all mean that both partners have to meet after separation. The key to being amicable during this process is to have rules about the new people in each others lives, arguments and children. These are usually formed during therapy and stop partners from resenting each other for the rest of their lives. Constant conflict often results in serious implications for everyone involved, especially children.
In the end, an amicable divorce is not about solving all arguments 100% and moving on, it’s about learning to have controlled arguments and focus on a mutual solution rather than being right.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, What is Divorce Mediation.
Gerald A. Maggio is a trained Orange County divorce mediator who has amicably resolved cases many cases out of court, as well as an experienced divorce and family law attorney. Mr. Maggio founded California Divorce Mediators in 2012 with the belief that although “not every marriage can be saved, every family can” and a mission to save families from the financial and emotional distress associated with traditional divorce litigation. California Divorce Mediators is located in Irvine, California, and serves the Orange County area and other counties in California offering divorce mediation, child custody mediation and mediation of other family law matters.
