4 Ways to Communicate Effectively with Your Partner During a Divorce
When two people decide to part ways, they may not be on speaking terms with each other, but may still want an amicable settlement that can be done efficiently and quickly without the intrusion of lawyers fighting a costly battle for the rights of their clients.
Whatever your issues are with each other, you need to put them aside prior to coming to the table and proceeding with divorce mediation in Orange County, California. In order to come up with an agreement that both parties are satisfied with, communication needs to be clear, unbiased, and free of emotion (albeit sometimes easier said than done). For divorce mediation to be successful, adopt the following ways to communicate effectively:
1. Choose a Neutral Stance on Issues
When talking with a mediator, many hot button issues may come up such as child custody, who gets the house, and other financial issues. Either you can take on a stubborn and unwavering approach when addressing these issues or you can ask your partner’s input on the issue, come up with reasonable solutions, and come to an understanding agreed on by both of you.
2. Listen to Your Partner
Ask your partner to voice up their concerns first before you share your input on it. By taking turns speaking and sharing views on certain issues, the mediator can make an agreement that is fair to both parties. While your partner is speaking, be sure to keep quiet and be attentive to what they are trying to communicate. Even if you do not agree with them, do not interrupt them mid-way. When it’s your turn to speak, they may do the same.
3. Make Certain that You Fully Understand the Agreement
Neither of you want to be misunderstood while communicating your views. If your partner says something, ask them again to avoid confusion when the settlement agreement is drawn up. Remember to use a respectful tone when asking them to clarify their point. Do not jump on them about something you don’t agree with before hearing it the second time. If you give them respect, they will give you respect in return. Listen to them, ask them again, and only then agree on it.
4. Present Your Views in an Objective Manner
Just like in a court of law where someone has to provide the judge with proof to prove their client’s innocence, you need to do the same during divorce mediation. You want the issues solved rather than become bigger than they already are.
In order to do that, you need to present your views on issues objectively. Provide them with evidence to back up your claim. For instance, the issue to keep or sell the house should be dealt with by providing evidence from different real estate agents on the value of the house.
By incorporating this communication technique while negotiating with your partner on issues, you both will be able to agree on a settlement in a good-natured manner.
If you are located in Orange County or anywhere else in California, and are planning to get divorced, you should seek the assistance of a reliable California divorce mediator. For further information or to schedule a consultation with California Divorce Mediators, please call (949) 553-0911 or visit www.cadivorcemediators.com. California Divorce Mediators is an experienced Divorce Mediation and Family Law firm serving the Orange County and Riverside areas and neighboring counties, serving individuals, couples and families with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, spousal support, child support and child custody issues.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”